Chippy tea!

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Brookbonds73
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Chippy tea!

Post by Brookbonds73 »

So there I go down to the local chippy. It's been a while since we've had fish and chips so off I trot. It's not a long walk, 10 minutes, give or take. A light drizzle begins and upon reaching said chippy the queue there is outside the shop. Two people inside and a further three outside including yours truly. So I take my place outside, the drizzle worsens. There's a menagerie of people in front of me, ranging I'd say from 20 to 80 all have masks on. The service inside is slow, I'm getting drowned outside.
An elderly gent gets his cod and chips and departs at another exit, no problem there me thinks, he probably lives alone after burying the wife outback under a rose tree. A bloke with fitness garb gets his pie and chips, no problem there either, he'll cycle that off in no time on his home gym I think or wank himself soft watching gay porn in his lycra shorts! Then it's the turn of a women with two screaming brats, they want differing items, I want to choke them! They want coke, give the little cunts the real McCoy I reckon and while you're at it mum, have a quick snifter yourself, you deserve it you poor bitch. As for little fuckface, get him something with plenty of bones in it, he may just choke on it accidentally, the little bastard, we live in hope. His brother I'm hoping has an allergic reaction which will have him bedridden for a month or six! They get served, I'm soaked but inside. Three down, one to go, hurrah!!
And then it happens, this monster in front of me has an order!!!!!!!!
She's thirty stone at least, she's not got kids, she's fucking eaten them, that's why. Brightspark at the counter confirms the order.
12 bags of chips, 6 mince beef pies, 2 pieces of fish and the body of an Ethiopian it seems, I switched off after the beef pies. I'm furious, I want to blowtorch miss world and feed her to the small country she's about to consume. Do you want any drinks asks the next mayor of London after she filled Shania's wheelbarrow with chips and that's when it really hit home. She wants 3 bottles of diet coke!!!
The no good cunt, I'm ready to commit murder now, diet coke, my hairy arse, give her the fucking oil, you've just cooked the chips in. She'll be dead in a fortnight anyway, so what's the odds.
She vacates, I've reached the front of the queue, hurrah!!
Won't be long love, just waiting for more chips!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Love a cup of Rosey I do.

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Newmarket
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Re: Chippy tea!

Post by Newmarket »

Brookbonds73 wrote: Wed Jan 20, 2021 11:42 pm So there I go down to the local chippy. It's been a while since we've had fish and chips so off I trot. It's not a long walk, 10 minutes, give or take. A light drizzle begins and upon reaching said chippy the queue there is outside the shop. Two people inside and a further three outside including yours truly. So I take my place outside, the drizzle worsens. There's a menagerie of people in front of me, ranging I'd say from 20 to 80 all have masks on. The service inside is slow, I'm getting drowned outside.
An elderly gent gets his cod and chips and departs at another exit, no problem there me thinks, he probably lives alone after burying the wife outback under a rose tree. A bloke with fitness garb gets his pie and chips, no problem there either, he'll cycle that off in no time on his home gym I think or wank himself soft watching gay porn in his lycra shorts! Then it's the turn of a women with two screaming brats, they want differing items, I want to choke them! They want coke, give the little cunts the real McCoy I reckon and while you're at it mum, have a quick snifter yourself, you deserve it you poor bitch. As for little fuckface, get him something with plenty of bones in it, he may just choke on it accidentally, the little bastard, we live in hope. His brother I'm hoping has an allergic reaction which will have him bedridden for a month or six! They get served, I'm soaked but inside. Three down, one to go, hurrah!!
And then it happens, this monster in front of me has an order!!!!!!!!
She's thirty stone at least, she's not got kids, she's fucking eaten them, that's why. Brightspark at the counter confirms the order.
12 bags of chips, 6 mince beef pies, 2 pieces of fish and the body of an Ethiopian it seems, I switched off after the beef pies. I'm furious, I want to blowtorch miss world and feed her to the small country she's about to consume. Do you want any drinks asks the next mayor of London after she filled Shania's wheelbarrow with chips and that's when it really hit home. She wants 3 bottles of diet coke!!!
The no good cunt, I'm ready to commit murder now, diet coke, my hairy arse, give her the fucking oil, you've just cooked the chips in. She'll be dead in a fortnight anyway, so what's the odds.
She vacates, I've reached the front of the queue, hurrah!!
Won't be long love, just waiting for more chips!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Those long winter evenings must just fly by BB :lol:
Bring back Jonathon !

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jameskel
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Re: Chippy tea!

Post by jameskel »

Please sum up 😊
Taans can fuck right off

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palerider
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Re: Chippy tea!

Post by palerider »

My local chippy in Langport, Pendra's, a fine establishment I might add, has a strict order online then collect service.

It's run by a lovely couple. A little Thai lady and Ernie, who's heavily into a Civil War re-enactment society to the extent that with said activities now postponed, you'll only be served without an existing order unless you're dressed as Oliver Cromwell.
New striker ?..... I'm down to my last 970 million.

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Brookbonds73
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Re: Chippy tea!

Post by Brookbonds73 »

Newmarket wrote: Thu Jan 21, 2021 8:13 am
Brookbonds73 wrote: Wed Jan 20, 2021 11:42 pm So there I go down to the local chippy. It's been a while since we've had fish and chips so off I trot. It's not a long walk, 10 minutes, give or take. A light drizzle begins and upon reaching said chippy the queue there is outside the shop. Two people inside and a further three outside including yours truly. So I take my place outside, the drizzle worsens. There's a menagerie of people in front of me, ranging I'd say from 20 to 80 all have masks on. The service inside is slow, I'm getting drowned outside.
An elderly gent gets his cod and chips and departs at another exit, no problem there me thinks, he probably lives alone after burying the wife outback under a rose tree. A bloke with fitness garb gets his pie and chips, no problem there either, he'll cycle that off in no time on his home gym I think or wank himself soft watching gay porn in his lycra shorts! Then it's the turn of a women with two screaming brats, they want differing items, I want to choke them! They want coke, give the little cunts the real McCoy I reckon and while you're at it mum, have a quick snifter yourself, you deserve it you poor bitch. As for little fuckface, get him something with plenty of bones in it, he may just choke on it accidentally, the little bastard, we live in hope. His brother I'm hoping has an allergic reaction which will have him bedridden for a month or six! They get served, I'm soaked but inside. Three down, one to go, hurrah!!
And then it happens, this monster in front of me has an order!!!!!!!!
She's thirty stone at least, she's not got kids, she's fucking eaten them, that's why. Brightspark at the counter confirms the order.
12 bags of chips, 6 mince beef pies, 2 pieces of fish and the body of an Ethiopian it seems, I switched off after the beef pies. I'm furious, I want to blowtorch miss world and feed her to the small country she's about to consume. Do you want any drinks asks the next mayor of London after she filled Shania's wheelbarrow with chips and that's when it really hit home. She wants 3 bottles of diet coke!!!
The no good cunt, I'm ready to commit murder now, diet coke, my hairy arse, give her the fucking oil, you've just cooked the chips in. She'll be dead in a fortnight anyway, so what's the odds.
She vacates, I've reached the front of the queue, hurrah!!
Won't be long love, just waiting for more chips!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Those long winter evenings must just fly by BB :lol:
Well let's face it, we'd wait a long time for our esteemed leaders to pop up and say hello, wouldn't we. Fucking last time they come on here, the Queen mum was alive 😁
Love a cup of Rosey I do.

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JayK
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Re: Chippy tea!

Post by JayK »

Brookbonds73 wrote: Wed Jan 20, 2021 11:42 pm So there I go down to the local chippy. It's been a while since we've had fish and chips so off I trot. It's not a long walk, 10 minutes, give or take. A light drizzle begins and upon reaching said chippy the queue there is outside the shop. Two people inside and a further three outside including yours truly. So I take my place outside, the drizzle worsens. There's a menagerie of people in front of me, ranging I'd say from 20 to 80 all have masks on. The service inside is slow, I'm getting drowned outside.
An elderly gent gets his cod and chips and departs at another exit, no problem there me thinks, he probably lives alone after burying the wife outback under a rose tree. A bloke with fitness garb gets his pie and chips, no problem there either, he'll cycle that off in no time on his home gym I think or wank himself soft watching gay porn in his lycra shorts! Then it's the turn of a women with two screaming brats, they want differing items, I want to choke them! They want coke, give the little cunts the real McCoy I reckon and while you're at it mum, have a quick snifter yourself, you deserve it you poor bitch. As for little fuckface, get him something with plenty of bones in it, he may just choke on it accidentally, the little bastard, we live in hope. His brother I'm hoping has an allergic reaction which will have him bedridden for a month or six! They get served, I'm soaked but inside. Three down, one to go, hurrah!!
And then it happens, this monster in front of me has an order!!!!!!!!
She's thirty stone at least, she's not got kids, she's fucking eaten them, that's why. Brightspark at the counter confirms the order.
12 bags of chips, 6 mince beef pies, 2 pieces of fish and the body of an Ethiopian it seems, I switched off after the beef pies. I'm furious, I want to blowtorch miss world and feed her to the small country she's about to consume. Do you want any drinks asks the next mayor of London after she filled Shania's wheelbarrow with chips and that's when it really hit home. She wants 3 bottles of diet coke!!!
The no good cunt, I'm ready to commit murder now, diet coke, my hairy arse, give her the fucking oil, you've just cooked the chips in. She'll be dead in a fortnight anyway, so what's the odds.
She vacates, I've reached the front of the queue, hurrah!!
Won't be long love, just waiting for more chips!!!!!!!!!!!!!
“Miss world” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
COYI!!!

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BCHammer
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Re: Chippy tea!

Post by BCHammer »

Have you been out since BB? Any sequels to share?

Or have you been stuck indoors getting in those 50 tommy tanks a day.

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Brookbonds73
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Re: Chippy tea!

Post by Brookbonds73 »

BCHammer wrote: Fri Jan 29, 2021 4:31 am Have you been out since BB? Any sequels to share?

Or have you been stuck indoors getting in those 50 tommy tanks a day.
There's a sequel on the way my good man.
Love a cup of Rosey I do.

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